Waco Moms: I Don’t Milk My Own Cows and Other Reasons to Go to Therapy

Thrive Wellness • May 10, 2022

I Don’t Milk My Own Cows and Other Reasons to Go to Therapy

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May 10, 2022

We at Waco Moms are for the de-stigmatization and promotion of therapy as a tool that should be encouraged and used by all mothers who find themselves in a place of needing assistance with their mental health. Thank you to Erin McGinty Fort, M.S., MHA, LPC-S, CEDS-S for sponsoring and providing us with this thoughtful insight.

This morning, I was laying in bed and reading one of my favorite blogs. This particular blog focused on an Instagram “momfluencer” who is a mother to almost seven, classically-trained ballerina, recent beauty pageant winner, makes sourdough bread from scratch, and owns a farm with her husband. I didn’t make it very far into the blog itself before I looked up her Instagram account, and- before I knew it- I found myself wondering why I, too, didn’t provide my family with fresh-from-the-teat cow’s milk every morning.

therapy resources

By the way, I won’t share this momfluencer’s name; this isn’t about her, because there is truly nothing more awe inspiring to me than a woman who does pirouettes while slicing beets. I mean that seriously. This post is about comparison, mom guilt, and why we all need someone to talk to about how that affects us.

If you’re anything like me, then you, too, fall prey to comparisons with other moms. Despite being told not to compare ourselves with others, it’s actually pretty hard to avoid. As a licensed mental health therapist of over 15 years, I spend hours every week talking with women about the negative effects of comparing our bodies, diets, parenting, and partnering with others. Yet there I was this morning, adding a yeast starter kit to my shopping cart because making bagels at home with a 3-year-old seemed like a good way to combat guilt from being gone all week on a work trip.

(Fantasizes about bagels for more time than I’d like to admit, returns to writing blog post that is due today.)

Broadly speaking, guilt means that you feel as if you have done something wrong. Sometimes guilt acts like our moral compass, letting us know when we are acting outside of our values. There’s also the idea of toxic guilt, which is when you feel guilty for, well, everything. When traveling for work, feeding your kid cereal for dinner, taking time away with friends or your partner, and forgetting about Crazy Sock Day at school create similar feelings to, oh, let’s say lying… then maybe something’s off about that.

If you just scoffed and mumbled, “Of course lying and socks aren’t the same” from the closet you’re hiding from your kids in, I get it. It sounds ridiculous to compare the two, and yet moms feel guilty all the time, from everything. Even one of the world’s greatest female athletes of all time spoke about her own mom guilt in a recent interview.

Therapy postpartum Normally I would look for any reason to be in the same club as Serena Williams. With a pandemic, rising inflation, world conflict, nuclear threats, skyrocketing rates of anxiety in children, working full-time in a helping profession, and keeping it cool with a toddler, though, maybe the mom guilt club isn’t one that I want to be in. Nor should you.

Which brings us full circle to therapy. As a society, we’ve made some progress on reducing the stigma related to mental health. Yet I’m still surprised that people believe that you have to be really struggling or really “sick” to go to therapy. In some ways, therapy is just this:

Person A isn’t feeling great about something and/or has something they’d like to be different.

Person B is the therapist, who is a person dedicated to listening to you, understanding you, and helping you to figure things out. They help to meet the same needs for you that you so lovingly provide to your families.

Together, both of them identify what Person A wants to be different, how they may have ended up where they are, and what might keep them stuck from changing. The process can be scary if you’ve never been through it, but- at the end of the day- your therapist is an imperfect human, too. We don’t judge, we definitely try not to bite, and we want to help you make things better.

And yes, sometimes those “things” are severe mental health issues. Sometimes they’re “things” like mom guilt, which really significantly impacts our quality of life. And that’s as a good of a reason I’ve ever heard to go talk to someone.

If you’re ready to unload that mom guilt you’ve been carrying around, here are a few resources to get you started:

Join Thrive Wellness Waco’s new monthly group , Mom Guilt Detox , to meet other guilty-as-charged moms, eat snacks that your kids haven’t licked, and learn practical tips for shedding that guilt.
Thrive Wellness Waco offers outpatient therapy, nutrition therapy, and psychiatry for you and your family’s mental health needs.
Check out Waco Moms’ new resource page to learn about other mental health help you can find locally and otherwise.

Erin McGinty Fort, M.S., MHA, LPC-S, CEDS-S

Interim Co-Chief Clinical Officer & Executive Director, Thrive Wellness Waco

Erin has over a decade of experience with exclusively treating eating disorders in men and women. She has worked at several nationally-known treatment facilities, including Rogers Behavioral Health, Castlewood Treatment Center, Monte Nido & Affiliates, and Eating Recovery Center. In addition to her role as a clinician, she has also served as a Program Director and Clinical Director. She has worked at all levels of eating disorder treatment throughout her career, including inpatient, residential, partial hospitalization, intensive outpatient, and now outpatient. She previously was the Coordinator of Eating Disorder Services at Baylor University’s Counseling Center. She is intimately familiar with the anxieties that can come with seeking help, as well as the different challenges that individuals and their families face along the journey of recovery.

Erin is a licensed professional counselor and supervisor in the state of Texas, and has her graduate degrees in both Counseling and Health Administration. She is a Certified Eating Disorder Specialist through the International Association of Eating Disorders Professionals (iaedp) , which allows clients to rest assured that they are receiving care from a highly trained, competent, and skilled provider in the area of eating disorders. Because of the rigorous demands that life throws at us and the flexibility needed for providing treatment, Erin is a Board Certified TeleMental Health Provider. She is a professional member of both iaedp and the Academy for Eating Disorders.

She has regularly provided eating disorder training and conference presentations to medical and mental health professionals.

A transplant from the Midwest, Erin has embraced Texas as her home. When not working at Thrive Waco, she enjoys spending time with her husband, daughter, and furry son.

The post Waco Moms: I Don’t Milk My Own Cows and Other Reasons to Go to Therapy first appeared on Thrive Wellness.

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Clean House, Healthy Mind: Spring Cleaning Benefits for Mental Health

By Sage Tippie • 23 Apr, 2024

Spring Cleaning Benefits for Mental Health Spring is a time of new beginnings, change, and transitions, including in our homes. With the warmer weather kicking motivation into high gear, Spring can be a prime time to do a deep clean. Not only is a clean space aesthetically pleasing to the eyes, but it can also help to improve your mental health. Learn about how tidying up your space can also tidy up your thoughts below along with tips for cleaning when you’re struggling with your mental health. 4 Reasons Why Cleaning is Beneficial to Mental health 1.Decreased Stress Not only does an uncluttered space provide a sense of calm, but the physical act of cleaning can release feel-good endorphins, reducing feelings of stress and anxiety. As you cross tasks off your checklist, your body also releases Dopamine. Also known as the “happy hormone”, Dopamine provides a sense of accomplishment and pride that can promote motivation in other areas of our lives. 2. Improved Focus Studies have shown that an uncluttered space can also lead to an uncluttered mind. Your focus can be drawn away from important tasks by a chaotic, messy space. Research has also shown a connection between procrastination and clutter, as an unwillingness to tackle larger chores like cleaning can translate over into various areas of our lives. By keeping your space tidy, it can inspire you to stay on top of other major tasks like work and school assignments. 3. Regulated Emotions According to this 2015 study , cleaning can function as a practice in mindfulness, providing an increased sense of calm and inspiration. Slowing down while cleaning gives you room to relax and free your mind of burdens, stressors, and irritants that can affect your mental health. Cleaning can even be considered a practice of self-care as the action helps you to connect with yourself and the outcome allows you to better enjoy your own space. 4. Sense of Order and Control When experiencing mental health struggles, people may feel a lack of control over their lives and emotions. Cleaning even small areas of the home can provide an increased sense of order and control as you cross tasks off your to-do list. Through realizing your own power by simply completing minor tasks like cleaning, it can reaffirm your ability to do more. 10 Tips for Cleaning When Struggling with Mental Health Mental health struggles and disorders commonly create barriers to one’s ability to clean and properly practice personal hygiene. Although these behaviors are normal side effects of mental health disorders, we want to work to aid our clients in cleaning to the best of their ability even in difficult times. Below, Thrive Wellness occupational therapist Meadow Deason shares some helpful tips she gives to clients when they struggle with cleaning due to mental health conditions: 1.Ask For Help Having support to clean can make a huge difference. Do the cleaning with the person helping you and have them hold you accountable. 2. Don't Wait for Motivation Motivation might not come before action, but it can build as you begin to see the results of your efforts. 3. Start Small Start with one area or one task and go from there. For example, concentrate on your bedroom first and then move on to the living room and bathroom. 4. Do Something Daily Even if you do only one small cleaning task a day, doing that one task creates momentum and prevents small tasks from building up and becoming overwhelming. 5. Use Sensory Modulation Change your environment by playing music, adjusting the lighting, or using aromatherapy. This can help to put you in a new headspace for cleaning. 6. Start with "High Impact" Tasks Start with more intensive or all-over cleaning tasks such as picking up clutter or doing the dishes. The visual "noise" of some tasks makes a large impact on the entire space, building motivation to continue cleaning. 7. Make a To-Do List Write a detailed to-do list of tasks and cross them off as you go. Physically marking down what you’ve accomplished can promote increased motivation. 8. Reward Yourself Set up a reward system where you reward yourself with a favorite activity or item when you complete a task as an incentive to clean. 9. Use the Rocket Method Don't think about it, just choose a task, countdown from five or ten and then start. This can help you to avoid potential anxiety and dread that can prevent you from cleaning. 10. Gamify Tasks Make up a game for your tasks or time yourself to promote increased engagement in cleaning. Your ability to complete tasks can be affected by a multitude of different factors and conditions including OCD , anxiety, depression , ADHD , and more. If you are struggling with motivation due to your mental health, help is here at Thrive Wellness.

child getting bandaid from doctor while mother smiles

The Importance of Whole Family Primary Care: A Q&A with Dr. Stephanie Wright

26 Mar, 2024

By serving the whole family, physicians are able to have a better understanding of family dynamics, family health care goals, and history of disease in the family.