15 Therapist-Approved Books to Change Your Perspective

Sage Tippie • May 8, 2024

Thrive therapists recommend these texts to learn more about yourself and others, better your life and relationships, and shift your perspective as a whole.

With hundreds of educational and self-help books to choose from, how can we decide which ones are worth the read? Whether you’re looking to better understand your mind-body connection, need powerful parenting advice, want to heal your relationship with food, or aim to tap into your most authentic self, these are the top reading picks that Thrive Wellness therapists recommend to clients and friends alike:

Julia’s pick:

1.Untamed by Glennon Doyle

“This is an empowering book for women, and mothers, that challenges some of the norms that women are expected to uphold.” - Julia Actis, LMSW, CSW-I

Lita’s picks:

2. What Happened to You by Bruce D Perry M.D, Ph. D and Oprah Winfrey

“This book helps to fundamentally shift how we understand individuals who have survived horrific experiences and lived to tell the story. They encourage us to shift our perspectives from what is ‘wrong’ with someone to what has happened to them. Written in 2021, it incorporates both up to date research and lived experiences to help develop a relatable and evidence based perspective of trauma, resilience and healing.” - Lita Gentry, LCSW, Lead Therapist for OCD Higher Levels of Care

3. Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski, Ph.D.

“Emily Nagoski's Come As You Are is written for women, about women, and by women. For far too long has women's sexual wellness been too taboo to talk about openly. Nagoski's book flips that narrative on its head. It provides insight into female sexual wellness and promotes education regarding the female perception of sex, orgasm and barriers to female sexual wellness. If you are a woman, or you are having sex with a woman, this is a must read.” -Lita Gentry

Keegan’s Picks:

4. Waking the Tiger by Peter Levine

“This book is a great exploration of trauma and the body's innate ability to heal. This is my favorite book for teaching clients about the connection between the nervous system and our emotional states. This book highlights the physiological impact of stress, anxiety, and trauma on the human body, including somatic illness. It offers valuable insights and practical exercises for overcoming the lasting effects of trauma and restoring well-being to our nervous systems through examination of the biology and behavior of wild animals. We can learn through the lens of how wild animals survive and thrive via the fight, flight or freeze response mechanism via full completion of the stress cycle response.” -Keegan Allen, LMSW, CSW-I

5. The Body Keeps The Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel Van Der Kolk, M.D.

“This book is helpful for anyone wanting to learn more about the human brain-mind-body connection, especially as it relates to traumatic events. Kolk revisits clinical experiences with patients, providing vivid examples of the various impacts stress has on the human body. For anyone who has experienced traumatic events, this book is validating in its acknowledgement of the latest neuroscience that suggests traumatic stress is associated with functional and chemical changes in the emotional part of the brain - the limbic area and brain stem. This book feels tangible with examples of patients sharing real- life experiences and their clinicians’ attempts to restore specific parts of the brain impacted by trauma.” - Keegan Allen

Kat’s Picks:

6. 8 Keys to Recovery from an Eating Disorder: Effective Strategies from Therapeutic Practice and Personal Experience by Carolyn Costin and Gwen Schubert Grabb

Amazon Description: “This is no ordinary book on how to overcome an eating disorder. The authors bravely share their unique stories of suffering from and eventually overcoming their own severe eating disorders. Interweaving personal narrative with the perspective of their own therapist-client relationship, their insights bring an unparalleled depth of awareness into just what it takes to successfully beat this challenging and seemingly intractable clinical issue.”

7. The Broken Mirror by Katherine A. Phillips, MD

Amazon Description: “In a world obsessed with appearances, it is not surprising that body dysmorphic disorder, or BDD, has manifested itself as a troubling and relatively common problem for many individuals. In The Broken Mirror, the first and most definitive book on BDD, Dr. Katharine Phillips draws on years of clinical practice, scientific research, and professional evaluations of over 700 patients to bring readers her expertise and experience with this often debilitating illness.”

8. Good Moms Have Scary Thoughts by Karen Kleiman, MSW and Illustrated by Molly Mcintyre

Amazon Description: “Author Karen Kleiman, coauthor of the seminal book This Isn't What I Expected and founder of the acclaimed Postpartum Stress Center, comes to the aid of new mothers everywhere with a groundbreaking new source of hope, compassion, and expert help. Good Mothers Have Scary Thoughts is packed with world-class guidance, simple exercises, and nearly 50 stigma-busting cartoons from the viral #speakthesecret campaign that help new moms validate their feelings, share their fears, and start feeling better. Lighthearted yet serious, warm yet not sugary, and perfectly portioned for busy moms with full plates, Good Moms Have Scary Thoughts is the go-to resource for moms, partners, and families everywhere who need help with this difficult period.”

9. Don't Believe Everything You Think: Why Your Thinking Is The Beginning & End Of Suffering by Joseph Nguyen

Amazon Description: “In this book, you'll discover the root cause of all psychological and emotional suffering and how to achieve freedom of mind to effortlessly create the life you've always wanted to live.”

Erin’s picks:

10. How to Raise an Intuitive Eater: Raising the Next Generation with Food and Body Confidence by Sumner Brooks and Amee Severson

Amazon Description: “With the wisdom of Intuitive Eating, a manifesto for parents to help them reject diet culture and raise the next generation to have a healthy relationship with food and their bodies.”

11. Body Happy Kids: How to help children and teens love the skin they’re in by Molly Forbes

Amazon Description: “ In Body Happy Kids, Molly draws on her own experience and a range of experts to provide parents with a much-needed antidote to the confusing health advice that bombards us every day. This reassuring and practical guide covers everything you need to help your child to care for their body with kindness, including how to approach good nutrition (without falling for diet culture), how to see the reality behind beauty ideals and how social media can be used to support body confidence rather than destroy it. With Molly's help, you can arm yourself with the insight and tools to raise resilient children who love the skin they're in.”

12. Big by Vashti Harrison

Amazon Description: “The first picture book written and illustrated by award-winning creator Vashti Harrison traces a child’s journey to self-love and shows the power of words to both hurt and heal. With spare text and exquisite illustrations, this emotional exploration of being big in a world that prizes small is a tender portrayal of how you can stand out and feel invisible at the same time.”

“These books provide important messaging for children, young teens, and parents on bodies, food, and learning how to embrace your body in a world that makes it difficult to do so.” -Erin McGinty Fort, MS, MHA, LPC-S, CEDS-S

13. Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be by Dr. Becky Kennedy

Amazon Description: “Offering perspective-shifting parenting principles and troubleshooting for specific scenarios—including sibling rivalry, separation anxiety, tantrums, and more—Good Inside is a comprehensive resource for a generation of parents looking for a new way to raise their kids while still setting them up for a lifetime of self-regulation, confidence, and resilience.”

14. The 5 Principles of Parenting: Your Essential Guide to Raising Good Humans by Aliza Pressman

Amazon Description: “The 5 Principles of Parenting doesn’t presume to tell you how to parent with ‘my way is right’ advice because the science is clear: There’s no one ‘right’ way to raise good humans. No matter how you were raised, how your coparent behaves, or how your kids have been parented up until now, you can start using The 5 Principles of Parenting to chart a manageable course for raising good humans that’s aligned with your own values and with your children’s unique temperaments. Whether you're in the trenches with a toddler or a tween (because spoiler alert: the tantrums of childhood mirror the tantrums of adolescence), it’s never too late to learn to use these 5 principles to reparent yourself and help your kids build the resilience they need to thrive. Through practice and normalizing imperfection, along the way you’ll discover the person you’re ultimately raising is yourself. By becoming more intentional people, we become better parents. By becoming better parents, we become better people. Let’s get started.”

“Most of us want to be good parents, but what does that really mean? These books give parents important insights on how to build healthy relationships with our children, repair when we are less-than-perfect, and effectively communicate with kids of any age.”- Erin McGinty Fort

Katie’s Pick:

15. Eating in the Light of the Moon: How Women Can Transform Their Relationship with Food Through Myths, Metaphors, and Storytelling by Anita A Johnston, PhD

Amazon Description: “By weaving practical insights and exercises through a rich tapestry of multicultural myths, ancient legends, and folktales, Anita Johnston helps the millions of women preoccupied with their weight discover and address the issues behind their negative attitudes toward food.”

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Navigating Coming Out: Emotional Wellness Tips for Every Stage

June 4, 2025

Coming out is a deeply personal, courageous, and in many cases, life-changing act. Whether you're sharing your sexual orientation or gender identity, coming out is about embracing authenticity and sharing an essential part of who you are. During the process of coming out, prioritizing your mental health at every stage is crucial. In this blog, we'll discuss insights and strategies to support your mental health before, during, and after coming out. Wherever you are in your journey, know that your experience is valid and you are not alone. Understanding the Mental Impact of Coming Out Coming out can bring about a lot of big feelings, including fear, relief, joy, anxiety, grief, and hope, sometimes all at once. Know that heightened emotions during this time are completely normal. Sharing such an integral part of yourself with the world can feel intense, but even with the ups and downs, being authentically you is worth it. Because LGBTQIA+ individuals face added mental health burdens due to stigma and discrimination, taking care of yourself during this time is more important than ever. You might experience increased anxiety, mental exhaustion, or avoidance ahead of coming out, so don’t be afraid to reach out for support. At its core, coming out is about authentic self-expression and showing your truest self, which can feel both exciting and scary at the same time . The self-acceptance and community gained from coming out is a vital part of finding long-term strength and joy. Still, it’s okay if you feel uncertain or conflicted, and these feelings are just part of the process. Before Coming Out: Emotional Preparation Coming out starts with reflection. Remember that there’s no rush when it comes to figuring out who you are. It’s okay to take time to understand your identity and what coming out might mean for you. Here are a few questions to consider: What do I hope to gain by coming out? Who feels emotionally safe to talk to? What are my fears, and how can I manage them? Mental wellness tips before coming out: Journaling can help you better understand your feelings and fears and explore different ways to share your truth. Talking through your feelings and different scenarios with a therapist , especially one who is LGBTQIA+ affirming, can help you to feel more supported and ready to come out. Practice grounding techniques like deep breathing, meditation, or visualization to ease anxiety ahead of sharing your identity. Helpful resources for coming out include: Trevor Project Lifeline (1-866-488-7386) TrevorSpace (an online community for LGBTQIA+ youth) OurCenter (a local community center for the LGBTQIA+ community in Reno) During the Coming Out Process: Staying Grounded The act of coming out can feel intimidating, as you’re sharing such a vital part of who you are. You might experience fear, panic, or doubt. While these feelings are real, know that you don’t have to navigate them alone. Tips for emotional resilience: Practice conversations ahead of time with a therapist or supportive friend so you feel ready when the time comes to share. Choose a time and place where you feel safe and in control. Use affirming statements, like, “I deserve to be loved for who I am.” Coping with negative responses: Set emotional boundaries with people who aren’t supportive. Create an emotional safety plan: know who you can call, where you can go, and what can help soothe you in moments of distress. After Coming Out: Processing and Healing Coming out, no matter how it went, deserves to be celebrated. An act of strength and authenticity like coming out is no small feat, so be proud of yourself for sharing who you are. Even so, the emotional aftermath can be complicated. You might feel joy and empowerment or loss and grief, especially if relationships shift. Healing strategies: Acknowledge your courage . Even difficult conversations are acts of strength. Rebuild your safety if you've experienced rejection. This might mean changing your environment or seeking new support systems. Release guilt or shame. Being who you are is never something you should feel ashamed or guilty for. Support networks can make a huge difference. Seek out different forms of support like: LGBTQIA+ support groups (in-person or online) Peer mentors or community leaders Allies, friends, or family who affirm and respect your identity Therapeutic options to deal with stress, grief, or isolation associated with coming out: EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) can help process trauma. Narrative therapy helps you rewrite your story in your own empowering voice. Coming Out More Than Once: Navigating the Long Game Coming out isn’t just a single milestone, it’s a recurring process. You might come out again and again: to a healthcare provider, a neighbor, a partner, or a friend. It can feel exhausting or unfair to have to come out more than once, but each time, you’ll continue to find more strength, confidence, and understanding for yourself. Other tips for coming out: Focus on cultivating a strong inner identity that doesn’t rely on external validation. You know who you are, and you don’t need to prove yourself to anyone. Create a personal toolkit of coping and grounding strategies to deal with stress or burn-out associated with coming out. Thrive Wellness offers a free breathing exercise guide to help relieve anxiety and calm the nervous system. Download it here . Find affirmation and support through community. This can look like finding a chosen family, looking up to queer role models, attending events that celebrate the LGBTQIA+ community and its history, and working on embracing authenticity and having pride in who you are. Remember, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to coming out, and it’s never too late to share who you are. Whether you're preparing to come out, in the midst of sharing your truth, or processing what came after, know that you are worthy of love, safety, and joy. Your truth is worth celebrating, today and everyday! For support during the coming out process and beyond, reach out to our team of affirming, inclusive, and compassionate mental and physical health care providers. We're here for you.

10 Simple Actions to Improve Your Mental Health

May 15, 2025

Taking steps to protect and maintain good mental health is key to living your best life. Whether it's managing stress, building emotional resilience, or simply finding a moment of peace during your busy day, developing a set of strategies to protect your mental health is essential. This Mental Health Awareness Month is all about turning action into awareness, so why not take action today to care for yourself and improve your mental health? This guide outlines ten impactful activities you can incorporate into your daily routine to boost your mental health starting today. By incorporating these activities into your days, you can take control of your mental health journey, grow personally, and improve your relationship with yourself and others. Why is Taking Action for Your Mental Health Important? Understanding the significance of proactive mental health care can change how we treat ourselves and move through our everyday lives. Taking action for yourself not only improves your overall well-being but also helps prevent existing or potential issues from becoming more severe. When you prioritize your mental health, you’ll feel a greater sense of happiness and productivity, paving the way for stronger relationships and a fuller, more enjoyable life. Focusing on your mental health is not just about problem-solving, but about living in a balanced and fulfilling way that supports your overall well-being and ability to thrive. 10 Effective Activities for Improving Your Mental Health It’s essential to have a repertoire of activities on hand that can boost your mental health. Simple activities like sleeping enough, meditating, spending time with a friend, or seeing a therapist can have huge impacts on your overall mental wellness. Prioritizing your mental health doesn’t have to be complicated or difficult, it’s just about doing activities that make you feel joyful, relaxed, or energized, fueling a better outlook on life overall. Here are 10 activities you can do today to help your brain and body to feel their best: 1. Mindful Practices Practicing mindfulness is a simple yet impactful step you can take in improving and protecting your mental health. Mindfulness practices include activities like meditating and mindful breathing to calm the mind and reconnect with the body. Meditation and breathing exercises are shown to reduce stress, improve focus, and grow your self-awareness. For more breathing exercises for anxiety relief, download our free guide “Breathe Easy” . 2. Eating Intuitively Eating intuitively is a powerful way to boost your energy and mood and reduce stress around food, helping to improve your overall mental health. This approach encourages a healthy relationship with food by promoting balance, variety, and pleasure without guilt. Intuitive eating helps you recognize and respond to your body's signals, leading to more mindful and satisfying eating experiences. By focusing on how foods make you feel, both physically and emotionally, you can make healthier choices that nourish your body and mind. Adequate nutrition has been shown to support brain function, improve mood, and reduce the risk of mental health conditions. 3. Sleep Hygiene Practicing good sleep hygiene is essential for maintaining overall health and wellbeing. Establishing a consistent bedtime routine helps regulate your sleep patterns, ensuring you get the deep sleep your body needs. Aim to go to bed and wake up at the same time each day if possible. Quality sleep is vital for cognitive function, emotional stability, and physical health, making good sleep hygiene a key component of wellness. 4. Mindful Movement Doing movement that you enjoy can have massive impacts on your mental health. Exercise reduces stress by triggering the release of endorphins, which have mood-lifting and pain-relieving effects. It also helps regulate hormones like cortisol, improving the body's ability to handle stress. By simply incorporating enjoyable movement into your routine a few times a week, you’ll see improvements in both your mental and physical health. 5. Go Outside Spending time outside can support physical, mental, and emotional well-being. It allows you to disconnect from everyday stressors, reconnect with the natural world, and experience a sense of tranquility and peace. Spending time in nature has been linked to reduced anxiety, improved mood, and increased mindfulness. Make time to explore outdoor environments such as parks, forests, beaches, or gardens. Practice mindfulness while in nature, focusing on the scenery and sounds that surround you. Incorporating nature into your daily routine can provide a refreshing break from everyday life, improving your mental health. 6. Make Time for Creative Pursuits Creative activities can be a great outlet for self-expression and reducing stress. Creativity allows you to explore new ideas, solve problems, and connect with your inner self. Even dedicating just 10 minutes a day to creative pursuits can have a positive impact on your mental health. Activities like drawing, painting, journaling, or crafting can help you unwind and stimulate your mind. Creative expression can also improve mood, enhance cognitive function, and foster a sense of accomplishment. 7. Practice Positive Self-talk Positive self-talk is a powerful habit that involves speaking to yourself in a kind, supportive, and encouraging manner. It's about cultivating a positive mindset and nurturing self-compassion. By shifting negative thoughts and beliefs to positive affirmations, you can boost your self-esteem and overall well-being. Practice acknowledging your strengths, accomplishments, and perseverance, even in challenging situations. 8. Practice Social Wellness Social wellness is about nurturing meaningful connections with others and fostering a supportive network of relationships. It involves engaging in positive interactions, building trust, and offering and receiving support. Cultivating social wellness contributes to emotional resilience, reduces feelings of isolation, and promotes overall happiness. Take time to connect with friends and family members regularly, whether through phone calls, video chats, or in-person gatherings. 9. Do Something for You Making time for yourself is crucial for maintaining life balance and preventing burnout. This involves setting boundaries, practicing self-care, and prioritizing activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Taking time for yourself allows you to recharge, reflect, and reconnect with your inner needs and desires. Self-care can take many forms, from indulging in a hobby to simply enjoying a quiet moment alone. Regularly dedicating time to yourself helps reduce stress, improve mental clarity, and enhance overall well-being. 10. Visit a Mental Health Professional Sometimes, we need professional support for our mental health, and that’s okay! Knowing when it’s time to see a therapist shows strength and self-awareness. No matter where you are in your mental health journey, getting guidance from a therapist can be a helpful tool in living your best life. Our team of mental health professionals are ready to support you now, don’t be afraid to reach out and open up. When Should I Seek Professional Help for My Mental Health? It's important to know when it's time to reach out to a mental health professional. Persistent feelings of sadness, anxiety, or emotional distress that interfere with your daily life are clear indicators for seeking professional help. If your coping mechanisms and self-care activities fail to alleviate your mental health concerns, reaching out can offer valuable support and interventions. Nurturing Your Mental Well-being Through Action Investing time and effort in your mental health can make positive differences in your everyday life. By understanding the importance of mental health practices and incorporating proactive strategies, you lay the groundwork for feeling better and staying mentally strong over time. Whether through improved sleep hygiene, mindful practices, or seeking professional help when needed, these efforts can bring more joy, emotional stability, and peace into your life. Make these activities a regular part of your day with a focus on self-growth, and you'll be on your way to a healthier mind and a fuller life.

Love, Doubt, and Obsession: Understanding Relationship OCD and How to Heal Together

April 28, 2025

Romantic relationships can be one of the most joyful parts of life, but they can also stir up deep fears, especially for those living with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). When OCD takes shape around your relationship, it’s known as Relationship OCD (ROCD), a lesser-known but deeply distressing form of OCD that centers on obsessive fears and doubts about your partner or the relationship itself. Have you ever found yourself spending hours analyzing how you feel, seeking reassurance that your partner is “the one,” or constantly second-guessing whether you’re truly in love? If so, you’re not alone. ROCD is real, and with the right tools and support, healing is possible. Let’s break down what Relationship OCD really looks like, how it affects interactions, and how to find more peace, connection, and presence in your relationship. What is Relationship OCD? Relationship OCD is a subset of obsessive-compulsive disorder that fixates on doubts, fears, or perceived flaws within romantic relationships. Unlike the normal ups and downs that every couple experiences, ROCD involves a preoccupation with intrusive thoughts that feel impossible to stop thinking about, like whether you’re really attracted to your partner, or if they’re “good enough” for you. These thoughts can feel distressing, uncontrollable, and all-consuming. What sets ROCD apart is the compulsive mental checking that follows. You might replay interactions, examine your partner’s every word, or repeatedly ask friends or family members, “Do you think we’re good together?” These rituals, designed to bring relief, often do the opposite. They intensify the anxiety and begin to erode the connection you’re trying to protect. Relationship OCD Examples: What It Can Look Like in Real Life ROCD doesn’t always look the same for everyone. For some, it shows up as intense anxiety about having children with their partner: “What if they’re not going to be a good parent?” For others, it might revolve around analyzing every interaction or feeling jealous of a past relationship their partner had. Here are a few common presentations of ROCD: “Do I love them enough? ” spirals, even when nothing’s wrong. Feeling distressed if your partner doesn’t respond the “right” way during a conversation. Constantly seeking reassurance from others about your relationship. Comparing your partner to idealized versions of relationships you see online. Avoiding important conversations or decisions (like parent-child planning) because of underlying doubts. The key thing to remember? These thoughts are symptoms of OCD, not reflections of reality. How OCD Affects Relationships ROCD can strain even the strongest partnerships. When someone is stuck in a cycle of obsessions and compulsions, it often leads to emotional distance, communication breakdowns, and frustration on both sides. A partner might feel like they’re walking on eggshells or like they’re being constantly evaluated. Meanwhile, the person experiencing ROCD may feel ashamed, misunderstood, or exhausted by their own mind. Many individuals report feeling like they can’t be fully present during time with their partner because their mind is so busy analyzing, comparing, or worrying. And over time, these patterns can impact the health of the relationship itself. That’s why relationship-centered, mental health-informed approaches are so vital. How to Treat Relationship OCD Thankfully, ROCD is treatable. But the most effective treatments don’t just focus on the relationship, they focus on the OCD. At Thrive, our therapists often use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and a specialized approach called Exposure and Response Prevention Therapy (ERP) . These modalities help people face their fears without performing compulsions. Over time, this rewires the brain’s response to uncertainty. Therapists may also incorporate experiential techniques like eye movement desensitization and reprocessing, which engage both the body and mind to help clients process intrusive thoughts and emotional pain. For some, prescription medication like SSRIs may be helpful as part of a treatment plan. For couples navigating ROCD together, couples counseling can support healthy communication and connection without reinforcing compulsions. How to Support a Partner with Relationship OCD If your partner is experiencing ROCD, your role is crucial. It's not about "fixing" them though, it’s about being a safe, steady presence. Here are a few ways to support your partner with ROCD: Educate yourself about OCD and ROCD so you can identify symptoms versus your partner’s true feelings. Avoid reassurance loops . It’s tempting to soothe their fears, but constant reassurance can reinforce the cycle. Encourage professional support with a therapist or psychologist experienced in OCD. Focus on building a relationship where uncertainty is tolerated, not feared. Practice empathy. Remember that these thoughts are distressing and involuntary. With the right tools and support, both of you can learn how to thrive even in the midst of mental health challenges. Final Thoughts: Healing Together ROCD can feel isolating and confusing, but you don’t have to face it alone. Whether you’re the one struggling or the one supporting, healing happens through community, compassion, and the right care. At Thrive Wellness, we believe in compassionate, holistic care, and we’re here to walk alongside you. Whether you need individual therapy, couples counseling, or a dedicated treatment plan, we’re here to help you find your way back to connection, peace, and presence. Need support? Reach out today and begin your journey toward healing together. For tools to help you cope with anxious thoughts, download our free breathing exercises guide "Breathe Easy" .